The Flakey Generation

Multiple times I've heard my generation be called flakey - whether by a lecturer, employer or volunteer team leader. There seems to be this general consensus (about students, especially) that we're just not reliable, hesitant to commit to events and usually drop out last minute when we do.

Perhaps we're like this because we're worried a better offer might come.

Perhaps we don't want to commit because we don't know if it's really "for us".

Or perhaps we're aware of our limitations.

See, I pride myself on never being late and sticking to the original commitment I made, whatever offers come later. I'm someone who wants people to value my own time and therefore value theirs. However, over the last year, I've come to take a more lenient approach.

Following some challenging months, with an overload in sports commitments, friendship pressures, housing issues, mental health difficulties, and taking an extra module (PS don't do it!) - I came to understand that there are a million reasons that someone is late or cancels last minute.

Very rarely is that coffee date a life or death scenario, or that session you said you'd coach, or that FaceTime you agreed to. What is important is that we turn up in the right mindset and can leave, not burnt out. If that means cancelling and rescheduling, it's not the end of the world.

This doesn't apply to everything, but as someone who made all my diary engagements a 'non-negotiable', I placed pressure on myself that wasn't needed.

And so what I think I want to say is this….

1. To those who try to do it all and are afraid of letting someone down, apologise and take some time for yourself - the world won't collapse for doing so.

2. To the people who label someone flaky or unreliable, let's first try to understand the motivation behind their choice to cancel.

3. Let's just do the loving thing and ask ourselves and others why? Suppose it's because they got a better offer. In that case, that's on them. But if it's because this commitment they made ages ago is now the last nail in the coffin to a really tough week, let's give them some kindness and say, "no worries, let's do next week instead".